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Thursday, February 23, 2012

For the Love of Boys: Bigger Picture Moment


Did you know that Batman adopted Robin?

Did you also know that a dog leash is actually a Batarang?

And...did you know that the "fort" made out pillows is actually the Batcave?

I have received a thorough education in boyiology these past four years.

And I'm loving every minute of it.

This wasn't an instantaneous love though.

In the beginning when I found out E was a boy, I was nervous.

I'm a girly girl and I know EVERYTHING about Barbies, and fancy dresses. But boys...boys baffled me. They were known to pee in your face {which has happened} and they play with gross things like dirt and worms {has happened}.

For those three years with E, I was comforted by the thought of "the next one", and that I might have a girl to share my Barbies with.

Then...the next one came.


We sat watching the ultrasound {all three of us} as the little baby squiggled and wiggled inside me. "Do you want to know the sex?" the tech asked us. I vehemently shook my head yes, and then came the words I didn't want to hear "It's a boy."

Now, I'm not diminishing the fact that I was overjoyed by this pregnancy and so excited to add another mini B2 to our family. However, I was sad.

And people knew. I had friends call and ask if I was ok. How I was holding up. I know this sounds terrible, especially to those that have experienced a loss, but to me it was. This was our last baby there would be no more trying.

I had the nursery designed {at least in my mind}, and THE PERFECT girl name all picked out.

It took months to wrap my head around it. I would be the ONLY girl in our family, even the cats are boys. I'd be surrounded by Star Wars, comic books, super heroes and basketballs. And my future would consist of dirty sweat socks and jock straps...YIKES!

I mourned for months over the fact that I would never have that Lorelai and Rory relationship, that shopping trips and spa dates weren't in my future.

It wasn't until I started decorating the nursery and looking at E's old clothes that the blessing fully gripped my heart and held on.


Now, after almost two years with my little redhead boy I couldn't imagine a life without him. He was born parallel to my dad's passing...a boy to carry on his memory.

And while it has been hard to give up playing with Barbies and knowing I'll never go wedding or prom dress shopping.

The love I feel for my boys is indescribable.

Thanks to them I'm learning new boyisms everyday. Things I NEVER would have discovered in a house full of girls. Like the fact that the blue light saber is Luke's and Darth Vader's is red.


So I embrace this boy love and hold it in my heart forever.

*Oh, and on the plus side I'll never have to have the thong conversation....hopefully.


Each Thursday, we come together to share the harvest of intentional living by capturing a glimmer of the bigger picture through a simple moment. And to spice it up a little, during the month of FEBRUARY, we’ll be reflecting upon the tender gifts of love that bring sparkle our lives.





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7 Comments:

At February 23, 2012 , Blogger Jade @ Tasting Grace said...

I love this post. I love it for your bravery in being honest about such complicated feelings and I love how it all turned out in the end. For what it's worth, I think you make an awesome boy's mama. :)

 
At February 23, 2012 , Blogger alita jewel said...

I wish we could get together. I know "just" what you mean. And my heart sank just a little when we found out that there would be another boy. We are raising little men, Brook. It is a BIG deal. I love both of my bambinos. Legos, Star Wars, super heroes, and transformers aren't so bad after all. ;)

Alita

 
At February 23, 2012 , Blogger Absentminded Mother said...

I too was a little disappointed in hearing that my first was a girl because for some reason I wanted a boy. Now I wouldn't trade my mini me for anything. My second child was a boy and I never had brothers, so raising a boy is very interesting. In the end they are your children and unconditional love is the best feeling in the world.

 
At February 23, 2012 , Blogger Melissa H said...

The feelings of motherhood are so complicated. I Was so sure I was a "boy" mom and I was so ready to have all boys when I had my daughter I was so confused.

Someday you may get daughters still. My MIL has too boys she got me (which you know is pretty awesome) and she is having a blast with my daughters.

You have an important job to raise future men and clearly you are ready to teach them bravery!

 
At February 23, 2012 , Blogger This Heavenly Life said...

You know I get this quite a bit, honey -- because after two girls I was kind of *terrified* of having a little boy. Now, I know we're only 4 months into this gig, but...

gah. I could not LIVE without this sweet boy.

One of my commenters on last week's BPM said it this way: you could not think your way into loving a boy, but you could easily *feel* your way into it once he was born. So easy in the end.

Still a little terrified of all the stuff I don't know about boys...thank God for manly husbands :)

(Thongs. You tryin' to make me sweat? I have TWO girls....)

 
At February 24, 2012 , Blogger Gabby said...

Awww. That was such a sweet post. I was nervous about my son as well, but he has been the biggest momma's boy, and I love every one of his cuddly hugs and sweet little kisses.

 
At February 24, 2012 , Blogger Hyacynth said...

Your honesty, your heart out there bare is so refreshing. I felt a little sad after I found out my E was a boy, too. But I'm with you. I understand now why God gave me boys; I'm learning about life in a way I never would have learned it with girls. Things are unfolding in such beautiful ways through the boystorm. Thank you for sharing this, Brook.

 

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